jpmurad

Moving the Rock

In Wise Eyes on September 29, 2008 at 6:45 am

The beginning of another work week and the end of a weekend.  I am reminded of the REI application that I picked up on Saturday.  With those three applications, go the hope of shifting out of the corporate structure and into a new life with writing.  Today, I have 40 workdays remaining at my current job.  This will put me past my two-year deadline, which will add the company’s part to my retirement.

Perhaps leaving with a bit of the company’s blessing on our retirement will somewhat redeem the experience.  Working in this job has been entirely trying; from dealing with difficult co-workers, to searching out possible career paths, to mourning over my own lack of passion in my job.  I would miss the mark if I did not mention that it has definitely shaped me.

These three frustrations (difficult co-workers, uncertain career, and lack of passion) have all created shifts in me.  With difficult coworkers, I have learned how I want to engage people; what experience I hope to create; regardless of their attitude or behavior toward me.  As I have searched out schooling and other means of developing my career, I have hit barriers.  School was an option, but not preferrable.  I wanted the authority to write.  For whose permission had I been waiting?  Lastly, I have found that passion comes at the price of risk, resistance and failure.  To engage passion means I will fail (hopefully gloriously), I will meet resistance, and I will have to risk.  But, knowing what I know now, I would choose no other way of living.

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